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Thursday, February 01, 2007
9:22 PM Getting Shirty I usually get my hair cut every 3 weeks, at least that's until mid December when I decided to grow it a bit longer for more of a Mark Gonzalez look. Well, I think that was sort of achieved, but it finally got to the point where it went a bit too long (verging on Bravery) so today it was time to get it chopped once again. The routine of getting my hair cut involves waiting for the barber (whilst reading FHM), sitting in the chair and saying "Hack it all away! I'm in a rush!". That was the path for today too, but I somehow deviated from it. Maybe it was the upcoming Spring that did it, maybe it was the confidence of being in a new year. Or maybe it was from reading Ladies Confessions in FHM. But something made me feel positively daring. Instead of asking for my hair to be cut, I asked for a haircut. "Certainly sir! What would you like?" "I don't know, but I want it to be cool. In fact, I want it so awesome that the sexiest of women will fall in love with me, but I'd be so cool that they won't say anything to me because a cool guy like me would never be interested in them no matter how pretty they thought they were". "I understand" "Not only that! But a haircut so cool that even if I start chatting to a woman, she'll ignore me because she'll think that it's all some sick joke because a guy like me would never be interested in an Ugly Betty like her (by comparison anyway, to the average guy she's be like some sort of Mischa Barton type person)" "Wow.... That is cool...." "Can you do it?" Well he only went and did! I know am in possession of the coolest haircut in history. Of course, that's just my opinion. What I have to do now is go out on Saturday night, and if I receive absolutely no female attention then that will prove it, right? It's just a shame I'll have the powers, yet they'll be rendered useless.  ----- I'm not sure if this is true or not, but I've heard it so many times that it's got to be for real. When women hang about together for a while, they start having their p*riods at the same time. I'm not sure what "a while" is classified as; does it only start happening after several rotations of the planet Venus, or can watching a long film in the cinema cause strangers to be embarassed? I don't know. Hell, I don't wanna know. What I do know is that guys can have the same thing. This has been touched on in Spaced with the machine gun routine: But I've discovered another one happening over the past few months. It seems that every Thursday, more and more guys at work are starting to wear pink shirts. At first I didn't even notice, as shirts are pretty much a functional item of clothing imposed by The Man to stop me wearing my 'A' hoodie and jeans to work ("In Okinawa, shirt means no need belt hold up pants"). That was until a guy at work said "Pink Shirt Thursday eh?". I looked at his pink shirt. I looked around at all the other pink shirts. I then looked down, and there it was; a pink shirt. I'd been assimilated. We have the numbers, now all we need is a cause. Leave a comment ::
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Dude... I dispute your hair claim! It is I who is in possession of the most awesome hair on the face of the planet! Muwahahahahaha!!
In my first year in residence (all girls residence) at uni, it seemed like every girl was on either one of two cycles. I've sinced learned in my women's studies class that that's a myth, but I don't know how they can prove that so conclusively.
Tim - You need two pink shirts (or salmon). One for Pink Shirt Thursday, and another more formal one for Rod Hull Day.
Um, do I have to?
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