 |
|||||||||
|
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
5:07 PM The Test Well, today was the day of the final test. For those not in the know, this wasn't the type of test where you forget to revise and end up taking the exam naked like in my nightmares; no, this was of the medical variety. I found out recently that a certain hereditary heart disease was prevalent in my family tree, and could have been responsible for grandad dying young. It's the same disease that killed Marc Vivien Foe and numerous other young sportsmen, so naturally (being the athlete I am) I've been kinda cacking myself since I've found out. Appointment booked, I stepped into the nurse's room, where I was instructed to whip off my shirt and lie down on the bed. Surprisingly, she didn't want to hug with our tops off- why aren't the nurses here as friendly as Prague?? Anyway, confronted with my Austin Powers chest and the inability of the little electrodes to stick, she had to sandpaper little patches away, ouch! Hooked up to the ECG machine, she switched it on. I was like 50 Cent on the treadmill, minus the running (come on, it could kill me). Then it began, the printout was being fed through. It didn't look good. Despite what looked like healthy heartbeats, there were a few minor squiggles (medical term) which I could only assume were murmurs. The nurse gave it a glance, bit her lower lip and took and breath through her teeth, then went to see the GP with the results. Encouraging! Then the waiting. Doctor GP came out with the sheet of paper, and told me that I should enquire about getting malaria vaccinations before going on holiday. Realising that he'd mistaken my results for a mini comic sans notice to be pinned up in the waiting room, he returned with the correct sheet, my life in his hands. And the verdict was... NOT GUILTY. I was in the clear! Woo-hoo! Not only did the tests show I didn't have HCM, but they showed that I was in fact IMMORTAL. Get in! Turns out I can only be killed if beheaded or having my heart broken (in the non-literal sense). So basically, as long as you don't have a sword and aren't madam Spearritt, you can do nothing to me! Muhahahahaha!! But seriously, don't try and test this, I still feel pain. Every single day. [/emo] Leave a comment ::
|
|
||||||||
| a r c h i v e s
|
|||||||||
|
Other contact me
|
|||||||||
| Blogs
somej.net - sparky malarky - iPandah - the world as i see it - strega nona solves it - dinah says nothing - Growing Up Twisted - inexplicable device - |
|||||||||